The first paid job

Friday 1st of June 2018. My first paid assignment in photography. Last week I sent my first invoice. A small, yet important milestone.

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I got the gig through my friend Natalie. It was her brother's high school graduation. I spent the entire day with them, capturing moments like proud mom kissing an embarrassed boy's cheek, popping of champagne (which funny enough I got the first glass of!) and friends and family gathering at home to celebrate until the early hours.

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The sun was shining all day (not the best condition for photography but I did the best of it) and I was a red lobster by the time I got home. I had a great time editing the images and I hope and believe they are left with a lot of lovely images to look back upon.

Until next time, Renate.

Spread the love #1

As a newly established photographer I seek as much inspiration from other creative souls as I possible can, to develop my own skills and push to become better and better. There are so many amazing photographers and artists out there that deserves to be put under the spotlight. I figured why not share some of my favourites with you guys, maybe you find someone knew to draw inspiration from?

The first photographer I would like to shine some light on is John Noonan. He is an American (if I am not mistaking) photographer who does a lot of high contrast images with a combination of black and orange as his main color scheme. His instagram feed is absolutely stunning, it is like stepping into a whole new world. I highly recommend checking out his feed --> click here.

 Screenshot of John Noonan's instagram.

Screenshot of John Noonan's instagram.

Speaking of out of this world, check out Mark Singerman's instagram feed, his portraits are simply magical. Mark is known for editing his images in bright, popping colors which makes up a fun, beautiful and highly enjoyable feed to scroll through. I personally tend to edit my images so they look more natural, but I would love to have a go at testing out editing one of my pictures in this style. Click here to check out the feed.

 Screenshot of Mark Singerman's instagram.

Screenshot of Mark Singerman's instagram.

I think out-of-this-world-magical is the theme in this blog post, as the next and last one for now is Stijn Dijkstra, who is a digital artist and photographer. Like seriously, have a look at the feed and dare tell me you would not want to live in that world? Stunning. Click here to check out the feed.

 Screenshot of Stijn Dijkstra's instagram.

Screenshot of Stijn Dijkstra's instagram.

Do you have any favourites? Please share in the comment section below, I would love to find some new, epic artists to follow.

Until next time, Renate

Dictatorship: part 4

Read the previous parts here;
Part one
Part two
Part three

Early spring 2015. I had been a “prisoner” in my own home and relationship for over one and a half year. In November I found out he had been flirting with a colleague for a while and not that innocent kind of flirt, but the “I wish I was at work talking to you” when spending the day with me kind of flirt. How ironic is that? Him being so terrified of me even speaking to another male, only to go and do what he fears the most himself. Maybe that is why he was like that with me, because he knew what he was doing?

What a total ass, excuse the language

I went home for Christmas. I was miserable. I cried and talked a lot with my sister, which was wonderful. I had at that time started opening up about my situation to her and also my friend Maria who also lived in London. I think the whole situation was the final push I needed. I came back to London and when he was done apologising (which happened almost immediately) he would get angry at me for bringing it up, for being sad, for not letting it go. Angry with me because I was hurt by his actions. What a total ass, excuse the language.

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So I stopped being sad. I stopped bringing it up. I stopped caring. When I looked at him I felt no love, I felt hate. I hated him for allowing me to waste so much time on him. I hated him for who he made me be when we were together. I stopped caring if he got upset with me staying out drinking with my colleagues. I stopped answering all his questions when I came home. I stopped his access to my accounts. No more big brother.

I stopped caring

It was Friday, early May. I was in the office drinking after work having a jolly good time. Then a colleague of mine said “there’s someone standing outside looking in through the window”. Our office was a bit lower than ground level, with windows all the way on one side so you could easily see the entire office from the street. It was him. I went outside and he was crying, asking me to come home. I almost did. But then I didn't. I started yelling at him instead. Saying everything I had been carrying around, before leaving him to continue my evening. I went home that night, slept, woke up, broke up, moved out.

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Until next time, Renate

My goals for 2018

I made a list of goals at the beginning of the year (posted on my old blog), where I stated six things I wanted to achieve in 2018 to make it a good year. I thought now would be a good time to to a check in to see where I'm at with these goals. Read the original blog post here.

Improve as a photographer

I have watched countless of youtube videos of behind the scenes on photoshoots, photo editing etc. and done a lot of photoshop and Lightroom tutorials. I have actually never used Lightroom at all before this year, so I have come a long way there. Now I couldn't be without it. I still need to do A LOT more shoots, I am a bit behind on that due to the dog, but I am sure that will come so I think I am on the right path to achieve this goal.

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Learn everything I need to know about owning a boat

So the boat is finally in the water, yey! I have learned bits and pieces about boats when Erik has been doing it up, but the real lessons and learnings will come during the Summer when we take it out.

Become a great dog-owner

We are doing the best we can. It is super challenging having a puppy, but we are doing what we can to ensure a good upbringing. We question ourselves a lot, probably too much, but we are taking puppy-lessons and training her the best we can. At the same time, we ensure she is fed, happy and safe at home.

Seize the opportunities that lays in front of me

I think I have done quite well on this point so far. When online store Briosa posted in a facebook group that they needed to team up with a photographer to do some shoots, I responded and got the gig. Now we have worked together several times and more to come. Fun!

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Become a better cook

I make a lot of food and think it is fun being in the kitchen, but I can definitely challenge myself more here. Need to up my game!

Take care of myself, both physically and mentally

Very up and down I'd say. Been better at taking care of myself physically than mentally, even though it has been difficult to find time to go to the gym between work and puppy. Mentally, things have been rather difficult the last couple of months. I still lack confidence in myself and I do worry way too much what others think of me, even if I know them or not.

Until next time, Renate